Grief, A Necessary and Painful Part of being Human

When Grief Really Hits Home; Something all of us have to go through, whether we want to or not, and even professionals grieve.

By T. R. Shaw Jr.                    

          I love summer in Michigan!  However, this summer has been different and a little darker than normal.  

        I have stepped back from many of the things I normally do, enjoy, and am involved with.  I’ve been dealing with grief following some intense losses.  Grief is something I’ve dealt with before, professionally and personally…but never at this level.

In the past several months, I’ve lost six people with whom I was close, including my mother.  Those losses have taken a toll.   

Before mom’s death we were dealing with round the clock care as she slowly faded from post-brain tumor surgery.  We watched her quality of life deteriorate.  It was not easy, emotionally, mentally, physically, and even financially.  I’m someone who normally juggles a busy schedule and needs to stay on top of everything, but family came first and I had to put much of my life and activities on hold.     

For several months I’ve not felt like doing much and spent many days in contemplation and reflection. This summer, following Mom’s death this spring, and the deaths of others, has been a decompression period.  We've come through more than two years of challenges, stress, dealing with loss and wondering what’s next? 

          We’ve put off cleaning out Mom’s house until after summer, we decided we all needed a break from the pressure cooker we’ve been in the past two years.  I’ve been tired a lot which I’ve learned is normal.  In many ways I feel I’ve lost joy in many of the things I used to get excited about, and that troubles me.

Some might think I’ve become a little anti-social as I’ve avoided gatherings, meetings and events I normally enjoy.  It’s important to guard my physical and mental health and deal with life’s new issues.  Interestingly, one of the books I read recently was Mel Robbins The LET THEM Theory and it gave me some relief from thinking about what others think as I try to figure things out.

          I had a career as a funeral director for nearly 40 years and took care of many people in that professional capacity.  Most assume that grief is a familiar entity for a funeral director.  I dealt with the grief of others often and thought I understood it, but until now, have never personally experienced it with this depth and magnitude.  

Among the other deaths I experienced were three very close friends and confidants, one of whom I actually held his hand as he took his last breath, and one who was a mentor and lifelong family friend who died suddenly and unexpectedly.  I was called on to help with arrangements which I was honored to do.  I also lost two relatives and an in-law who was hospitalized just before we were meeting for dinner and died a few days later.

Funeral directors, I’ve always said, deal mostly with death, but seldom with dying.  This couldn’t be truer in my case.  As professionals, we are there to help the bereaved through one of life’s most difficult and emotional events.  We can understand their grief, help them through it, and guide them on the journey back to normal.  We know a lot about grief, except how it actually feels.  In most cases we are neutral spectators.

I saw many families over the years try to avoid grief and deny the reality of death because everyone was so busy.  Many said, “We’ll do something later.”  It only made things worse down the road.  Many times, nothing happened. 

Grief denied is grief delayed in most cases, it cannot be avoided, according to experts.  Yes, death is inconvenient when we have other plans, so let’s put this off.  That’s not healthy.  I even had a family once say, after I made suggestions for memorialization, “Oh, we don’t do that grief thing.”  I shook my head in disbelief as I knew what was coming for them.  Grief is something you must go through, you cannot go around it. 

In my funeral career I saw how many religions deal with death and grief.  The Jewish faith has a specific set of rituals and timelines which include clothing, symbols, and various events.  Catholics still have a formal ritual for burial of the dead.  In many of the charismatic contemporary churches the entire congregation shows up to support the family or individual.  While many today try to avoid grief, those practices are beneficial for going through grief and accepting a changed life and relationship.  For many, secular Celebrations of Life, are no more than grief denial events and often do little for those truly hurting.

I went through grief with my father’s death 25 years ago, but I had our funeral business to keep me occupied and engaged.  My grief manifested in a completely different way.  I still miss him tremendously, the grief never truly ends, but I was carrying on our work, and it honored him.  It gave me purpose and energy to keep moving forward.  I was also twenty-five years younger then.

I feel as if the past several months have come at me like a freight train.  Taking care of our mother with multiple deaths around me was challenging and exhausting.  Few outside our family can really comprehend what we experienced, nor understand our unique grief.

          There have been nights when I couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to get out of bed in the morning.  I wasn’t sure if I was experiencing normal grief (whatever “normal” is), full-blown depression, or possibly PTSD.  I tend to overthink things.  I know that grief is something we all must go through and not around and I accepted it for what it is.  The cure for grief is grieving, and it takes time.  It’s been a rollercoaster of emotions as I contemplate the next chapter of life.   

I decided to take time for myself, reflect, pray, and let time do its thing this summer.  I’ve done a lot of reading, research and self-reflection to understand what I’m going through.  I’ve learned I’m not the person I was a few months ago and, in due time, will be a different and better person.  Sometimes you must go to the mountaintop to see the valley.

I read a lot of scripture dealing with life, death, the afterlife and took comfort in the wisdom of the ages. 

One of the most comforting passages I read dealt with not worrying about tomorrow because God is already there and has a plan.  “Don’t be afraid, for it is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 31:8

In one of my readings which I found profound about physical life itself said;

“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience.”  

          A frequent speaker at our funeral conventions was Rabbi Earl Grollman, an expert, author and lecturer on grief and loss.  I was blessed to hear him speak several times throughout my career.  To me, his most memorable quote on grief was this;

          “Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness.  It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love.  The only cure for grief is to grieve.”  He added, “Grief is love not wanting to let go”.

          As the summer winds down, I hope to begin anew this fall, with a new perspective and wade back into the world that once was.  I know things will be different; life goes on in a different form.  Those I knew and loved would expect nothing less of me and I’m sure they would hope that I move forward.  There is still life to be lived

          All of us experience grief at some point.  How we face it and deal with it makes all the difference.  It can be devastating or enlightening, but it is a necessary part of the human experience and it takes time.  

           Like love, grief never ends but it does become part of you and the hardest part is simply going through it.

          I hope this helps anyone facing those challenges, and remember, you’re not alone.

          

T. R. Shaw Jr. is a Battle Creek, Michigan-based journalist, author and historian.  He is both a retired funeral director and retired U.S. Navy officer and active in many professional, military and civic organizations.  His book, Defy the Immediate; a Journey of Failure, Perseverance and Success, is a motivational memoir on lessons learned across multiple careers and has earned critical praise in several literary circles. www.trshawjr.com

 

 

           

 

Robert E. Lee and Me; A Southerner's Reckoning with the Myth of the Lost Cause

By BGEN Ty Seidule, U.S. Army (Ret.)
Professor Emeritus of History; 
U.S. Military Academy at West Point

 By T. R. Shaw Jr.

            It’s not often a book is both current and historical, but General Seidule’s book on the history of the Civil War, growing up Southern, and his change of heart on a legendary military figure manages to encompass both.

 

            Seidule recently retired as head of the History Department at West Point, but his journey as a young Virginian who idolized Robert E. Lee, graduated from Washington and Lee University, and then became an Army historian, has lead him to a lifetime of study of military leaders and the truths behind them, especially those who were on both sides of the Civil War. 

 

As the title suggests, he comes to an epiphany on Lee as a flawed leader who betrayed his nation and is responsible for the deaths of more Americans than any other individual in history.

 

            With his background and knowledge of the Union and Confederacy, Seidule was appointed to the commission which renamed many of our Southern military bases, originally named for Confederate leaders who “betrayed” our nation but who were originally honored as an appeasement to the division of the times, and part of the healing as he explains.

 

            The book goes far beyond common knowledge of the Civil War and goes into great detail on why the Civil War was only, and completely about Slavery.  He talks about the myth of a Romantic South in popular culture in works like Gone with the Wind, and Song of the South, and how genteel Southern life has been presented, portrayed and preserved.   He reveals the truths behind Southern Leaders as traitors, many who were trained, including Lee, at West Point and then took up arms against their own countrymen and committed brutal and atrocious acts towards fellow humans. 

 

For many, it’s a very controversial, hard-hitting, and despised book, but it’s based in historical facts, accumulated over a long career of research and study.   Some of the truths he exposes about the Civil War are hard and uncomfortable to read.  He goes into detail on aspects of human behavior many find unconscionable, and hence has attracted many “haters” to his message.  

 

As a historian myself and one who thought I knew a lot about the Civil War, it was a huge learning experience from a perspective I have never seen.   I first became aware of Seidule when he did one of the 5-minute educational videos for the Conservative website, Prager University,  Was the Civil War About Slavery?  At the time, it was a very controversial, but important act.  He literally, put his career on the line.

 

He discusses the reaction to that video and how it sparked his desire to tell his story about Lee and the truths of the great conflict.  I found it doing history research when Seidule was a colonel at West Point and head of the history department.  He retired a few years later as a brigadier general and helped transform West Point’s understanding of their alumni and former leaders, which has lead to many educational and physical changes at the hallowed institution.  I was impressed and viewed it as the most concise explanation I’d ever seen on the Civil War and I began to learn more about Seidule and followed his cause closely.

 

I admire Seidule for his courage to take on this emotional and divisive issue.  Many today in this era of “wokeness” decry such enlightenment as “rewriting” history, when it fact, he is clarifying it. 

 

For example, he points out that Fort Benning, which is one of our largest and highest level infantry training sites, was named for Confederate General Henry Benning, who never wore the American uniform and slaughtered vast numbers of American soldiers.  It is now named Fort Moore, honoring West Point graduate General Hal Moore, one of the most highly decorated infantrymen and his wife who are buried on the base. 

 

Likewise, Fort Bragg was originally named for Braxton Bragg who switched sides in the war and took up arms against American’s, it is now Fort Liberty. 

 

Regardless of you position on political correctness, the book is a great read and highly enlightening.  His story of personal transformation as a youngster who grew up viewing Lee as a near deity and someone to emulate, changed with the truth.  As a Virginian he admits his original ambition in life was to become a “Virginia Gentleman” like Lee.

 

In the end, Seidule states, he is proud to have worn the blue uniform of his nation; the UNITED States of America, and points out that America is the only nation in the world who fought a war to abolish Slavery, freeing more than 4 million men, women, and children from chattel slavery.  For that, we should be proud as a nation.

 

Whether you study history or current affairs, this book is a must read for our times and well worth your attention.  You may not like much of it, and may disagree with the points, but it is definitely an education in a misunderstood era in our history which is still haunting us in the 21st Century.

T. R. Shaw Jr. is a Battle Creek, Michigan author, historian and community leader.  He is a retired U.S. Navy officer and funeral director.  He serves on several boards and military organizations and is presently a community college trustee.  www.trshawjr.com

 

 

Bob Dole and the passing of the "Greatest Generation"

 By T. R. Shaw Jr.

Battle Creek, Michigan—As World War II ended in 1946, thousands of seriously wounded combat veterans came to my hometown of Battle Creek to recover and renew.  For many, it was much more than just a hospital, the experience here changed their lives and the direction of our nation.

            Prior to the war, in the early 20^th Century, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg, a pioneering physician and Seventh-Day Adventist, built the nation’s top health institution, the Battle Creek Sanitarium. 

The “San” was the Club Med of its day, bringing nobility, celebrities, and world leaders to Battle Creek for Kellogg’s holistic and ground-breaking, if not unusual, health and diet regime.  As history has it, the Corn Flake was invented here, by accident after a batch of granola was left out overnight, and rolled into flakes.  Kellogg’s younger brother, Will Keith Kellogg, saw opportunity and took the innovation, against his brother’s will, and established the cereal industry, forever changing our world’s breakfast habits.

Dr. Kellogg later struggled financially with the Sanitarium, then the great depression finished it.  The institution closed in 1943 and went into receivership, as World War II thrust us back into economic revival. 

The Battle Creek Sanitarium was taken over by the government and became the Percy Jones Army Hospital on February 21, 1943, named for the patriarch of modern military field medicine.  Jones died in October, 1941.  

Many communities took in wounded veterans, but Percy Jones became one of America’s largest, and leading veteran recovery and rehabilitation hospitals, treating thousands of gravely wounded and amputee veterans.  The hospital became a long term home to many who lost limbs, or were severely physically wounded.  For most it was a first step toward mobility and a return to normal life.  Many veterans stayed in Battle Creek and met future spouses here, becoming a part of the community.

For future Senators Bob Dole, Dan Inouye and Philip Hart it had deeper meaning, as all of them spent substantial time at Percy Jones in Battle Creek and forged great friendships that would take them to the heights of government service. 

The former sanitarium and Army hospital is now a federal building, housing several components of the Defense Logistics Agency.  It is now appropriately named the Hart-Dole-Inouye Federal Center in tribute to three of the most distinguished patients who went on to lead our nation.

The death of Bob Dole marks the last surviving namesake of the building.  Philip Hart died in 1976, and Dan Inouye died in 2012.  Both Dole and Inouye were present for the naming ceremony in May 2003.  Although, not named, another wounded veteran, John Swainson, recovered at Percy Jones and went on to become the Governor of Michigan in 1961.

Because of the large amount of patients and wheel chairs, Battle Creek became the first city in America to put curb cuts on all its street corners so wounded veterans could access the nearby downtown.  Many of the veterans were offered jobs in the community as part of their rehabilitation.  Local merchants opened their doors, arms, and hearts to many of them and gave them beneficial part-time employment as they worked their way back to normal. 

A close friend of my grandparents owned the local Oldsmobile dealership just two blocks from the hospital.  He took on Bob Dole as a part-time salesman, along with many other veterans in the garage.  Many local business owners did the same.  Battle Creek embraced all the veterans who came to our community.  It was a remarkable time in our history.

I never met Senators Dole or Hart, but I did have an opportunity to meet Senator Dan Inouye on his very last visit to Battle Creek in 2010.  Then-Congressman Mark Schauer invited Inouye and his wife, to visit and tour the namesake Federal Center and speak to a large audience.  I was given the opportunity to introduce Inouye, the senior Senator from Hawaii.

With Sen. and Mrs. Inouye, 2010
(Photo by Al Lassen)

Inouye came from pre-statehood Hawaii’s Japanese population.  He had to overcome the “enemy-alien” status following the Pearl Harbor attack, being a native-born child of Japanese parents, to serve in the Army.  Until WWII he had never been to the mainland United States.  He did some brief Army training in Texas, then went off to Europe where he was gravely wounded in Italy in 1945, when a grenade shattered his right arm. He was treated and transferred to Percy Jones in Battle Creek for recovery.  He eventually earned the Medal of Honor. 

He credited Battle Creek as the place which truly made him an American and where he learned to love the United States.  He had to relearn how to function, even how to eat.  It was during this time that he lauded all the staff and nurses who helped educate him on America as he became a citizen.  He said that Battle Creek ignited his fire for all that is good in America and he went on to serve his native, now state, of Hawaii for many years.

Dole, was also wounded in Italy in 1945 with the 10^th Mountain Division, when a German grenade hit him in the back, shattering part of his spine, collarbone and arm.  Fellow soldiers didn’t think he would survive and gave him a large dose of morphine.  They then put an M on his forehead, with his own blood, to prevent others from giving him another potentially fatal dose, and moved on.  He was recovered by medics and survived, and rehabilitated in Battle Creek until late 1947 when he was medically discharged as a Captain.

Hart, a fighter for Michigan and
deemed "Prince of the Senate"

Hart, was wounded on D-Day at Normandy when his arm was nearly shattered by enemy fire.  He recovered at Percy Jones and went on to the University of Michigan Law School and the United States Senate in 1959 representing Michigan.  He died in office in 1976 and the main Senate Office Building in Washington bears his name.  He is buried at Mackinac Island’s St. Anne Cemetery.

Senators Hart, Dole, and Inouye, who all passed through Battle Creek, bring up the rear of what has been termed “The Greatest Generation.”  A generation of patriots who sacrificed and saved our nation, and the world and set the standard for the freedom we enjoy today.  They are quickly slipping away.

Let us take time to reflect on all the true heroes and patriots who saved the world in the middle of the 20^th Century and gave us all that we have today.

We must never forget the sacrifices, love and perseverance veterans of this generation gave us.  They are almost all gone now, Bob Dole was 98. 

Eternally grateful, just isn’t enough. 

Rest in Peace brothers, the torch has been passed.

 

T. R. Shaw Jr. is a Battle Creek author, historian and community leader, and is a retired U.S. Navy officer and funeral director. www.trshawjr.com

Diabetes, the forgotten Pandemic

By T. R. Shaw Jr.

            As the COVID-19 pandemic grinds on and continues to dominate our psyche, airwaves, and media, we have another pandemic flying under the radar that we need to deal with.  Few seem to embrace it or acknowledge it, even those who struggle with it and, many don’t know they have it.

The forgotten pandemic is diabetes.  It is lurking in our bushes and ready to pounce on us at any time.  Few are aware that November 14 is designated World Diabetes Day.

            Diabetes is expected to affect one in three of us in the next 15 years, or sooner, according to the American Diabetes Association.  It is presently the greatest threat to our collective health, notwithstanding COVID, and is not letting up.  The consequences of ignoring it are dire.  It takes awareness, knowledge and action.

            Diabetes is connected to almost every other health condition we face.  Heart disease, kidney failure, blindness, neuropathy, obesity, and many other conditions are typically part of undiagnosed diabetes.  It is estimated that diabetes-related illness threatens to overwhelm our health care delivery system. 

We also have media bombarding us with unhealthy food choices.  Many communities have limited access to quality and healthy foods or a substantial grocery store, especially in underserved areas where many subsist out of convenience stores.  In that sense, diabetes isn’t just a medical and health issue, it’s an economic issue as well which needs to be addressed.  Only now are Americans beginning to understand this complex health and societal issue and how it threatens our future. 

It is especially rampant in Michigan and Calhoun County and is just now being addressed, but barely.  Ironically, Battle Creek was once known as the Health City at the beginning of the 20^th Century.

            Recently, Rotary International has taken on the issue of diabetes and is working to elevate it to a major cause within the organization.  While it’s exploding here in the United States, it’s even worse in other parts of the world.

For the past 60 years Rotary and the Rotary Foundation, along with other foundations, have worked hard to eradicate Polio through fund-raising, vaccination missions, and public education.  Polio has been eradicated in the United States and is down to only a few cases in the most remote parts of the world.  We are “This Close” to eradicating it forever.  We now have a generation who’ve never heard of polio.

            In the next several years, Rotary will work to make diabetes a thing of the past as well, much in the same way they’ve dealt with polio.  Rotary has created a world-wide Rotary Action Group for Diabetes (RAG-Diabetes) and locally, the Cereal City Sunrise Rotary Club has created a local Rotary Action Group to work on awareness and advocacy issues.

            Recently, the club hosted a program with Edwin Velarde, a California Rotarian who heads Rotary’s diabetes action group, and is the founder of EPIC Journey Against Diabetes, a cycling tour raising awareness of diabetes.  Velarde was diagnosed with diabetes at age 29 and took up cycling as a way to deal with his condition.  His EPIC rides have taken him from Chicago to Atlanta, Chicago to Toronto, and before the pandemic, London to Hamburg, Germany for Rotary Conventions.  A Southwest Michigan ride is in the works for next year and the Cereal City Sunrise Rotary club will sponsor and promote it.  The morning Rotary club hopes to raise awareness of diabetes in our community and help people get screened.  The club also plans to raise funds to assist those who cannot afford life-saving insulin.

            Meanwhile, nearly everyone has some experience with diabetes, either personally or within their family.  Some groups are especially hard hit by this disease and for many demographics it’s a cultural issue. 

While technology, new treatments and research, including stem-cell research, are ongoing, federal funding for diabetes lags dramatically behind other health issues.  New medicines, glucose monitoring devices, and awareness are growing every day, yet basic insulin needs to be as available, and as affordable, as aspirin if we are to deal with this as a society.

            As we return to “normal”, part of that normalcy will be dealing with the exploding problem diabetes brings to our communities and economy.

            Rotary stands ready to take on this challenge, much in the same way we’ve dealt with polio.  Diabetes is in our future, we have to meet this challenge head on, and the future depends on it. 

            For more information on Rotary’s diabetes efforts visit, www.rag-diabetes.org and join Rotary in this fight.  For more information on Rotary, visit, www.rotary.org.

T. R. Shaw Jr, is a member of the Cereal City Sunrise Rotary Club, local author, long-time business and community leader and a diabetes advocate.  He is heading the Rotary District 6360 Action Group for Diabetes.

Why History Preservation is so Important to the Future

By T. R. Shaw Jr.

            As a baby boomer, I’ve seen a lot of history in my lifetime.  My generation grew up in the post-World War II boom, where the second half of the 20^th Century saw the greatest advances in nearly everything; to the internet and the information age, space and the moon landing, muscle cars, and arguably, the greatest music ever made. 

As boomers, we’re pretty nostalgic.  We want to look back at the great things we’ve experienced and witnessed as we reach retirement age.  I know firsthand that many of us boomers long for simpler times and want our posterity to learn about it and to see how great it was, even with the social strife that came with it.

A few years ago, I finished my career as a funeral director.  Our funeral home, Shaw Funeral Home, was the first in Battle Creek, Michigan; founded in 1866 and operated by four generations of my family since 1909.  As a funeral director I had a front row seat to history, in both my childhood and professional life.  I oversaw the passing of my community’s finest citizens and families.  I was honored and privileged to write many of their obituaries which will be reviewed and studied by future historians.

Educated as a journalist, I was taught the idea we write the first draft of history, and it’s true!

I’ve always been close to history and lived through much of it and have written about a lot of it.  I participated in historical events in the military, including the end of the cold war, Navy ship commissioning, global conflicts, and world changing events, including witness to the Beirut Bombing of our Marines and its aftermath, the first volley in the War on Terrorism.

I was blessed to study Michigan history in high school and at Central Michigan University. I had wonderful professors who ignited my passion for all things Michigan and piqued my curiosity.  I fondly remember taking part in Michigan Week events as a youngster, something we should bring back.  It lit my passion for our state.

A while ago, I was asked to get involved with The Battle Creek Regional History Museum, (BCRHM).  I was flattered but put it on the backburner as something to do “later.”  I had the opportunity to do a presentation on Navy History for the museum a few years ago and it reignited my interest in local history and the museum, which was about to transform into something great.  Recently, I was elected to serve on the RHM Board of Directors and have jumped in with both feet.  Timing is everything.

I’ve always believed Battle Creek has the very best local history in Michigan, so much has happened here.  Most peg us as the Cereal City, but we’re so much more.  Battle Creek has been the site of many industrial era revolutions, religious and social movements, military history, and music revolutions in all genres.  I’m excited to be part of our local history network.

The Battle Creek Regional History Museum is still in its infancy and holds a great deal of promise to become one of Michigan’s top historical destinations.  Right now, it’s a work in progress.  Presently, communities all over Michigan are reclaiming their collective history, as they should.

If you are not aware, the BCRHM is at 307 West Jackson Street in the old Battle Creek Equipment Company building.  It is perfectly situated at the confluence of the Battle Creek and Kalamazoo Rivers along the linear park, and next to historic Sullivan Barn. The building itself is historic. The company manufactured a great deal of exercise equipment for Dr. Kellogg’s Battle Creek Sanitarium and the public. 

BCRHM is very close to paying off the original mortgage and then can begin really making it into something spectacular!  You can help!  We still need the community’s resources going forward to make it so.  It’s a very worthy investment, not just in our past, but our future.

Recently, many of the BCRHM board members, including myself, were interviewed by history students at Albion College.  This chat really encouraged me to continue to speak out on historic preservation.  It was refreshing to see a new generation taking a strong interest in history.  History is not boring!

My hope is the BCRHM continues on its meteoric rise as a source of community pride, an educational resource, and inspiration for many years to come.  If we don’t preserve our history now, it might be too late, and lost forever.  There is so much here to be proud of and we have to preserve it for those coming behind us.  It’s just the right thing to do! 

We hope to see you soon!

To become a member or contribute to the BCRHM visit www.bcrhm.org. 

You can also support the museum through the Battle Creek Community Foundation.  The donation link at the BCCF for the museum is:

www.bccfoundation.org/fund/regional-history-museum-capital-campaign-fund

T. R. Shaw Jr. is a lifelong resident of Battle Creek, Michigan, CEO of Shaw Communication, and board member of the BCRHM.  He is a retired funeral director and Navy officer as well as a published author and freelance writer.  www.trshawjr.com

Diabesity; The Pandemic We're Not Talking About

 By T. R. Shaw Jr.

   

 As I watched this year’s Super Bowl LV, it was great to see an ad for Dexcom, a personal diagnostic device to continuously monitor blood glucose level on your phone, without finger pokes!  This device, and others like it, which I use and swear by, are a quantum leap in self-management of diabetes.  

As a diabetes advocate, the exciting thing was this ad affirmed that diabetes awareness is becoming more mainstream, and the growing chronic disease is finally getting the media attention it deserves. 

The fact it aired in a Super Bowl ad is unprecedented and welcome!  But, I had to chuckle a little though, because it was preceded by a Mountain Dew ad! 

A few days earlier I had an appointment with my endocrinologist.  He brought up a term I’ve never heard…diabesity.  He said it’s America’s silent pandemic, and that it's exploding and we’re not hearing about.  I couldn’t agree more.

I did a little research on the term, "diabesity."  It's a well documented condition for the past 10 years.  Diabesity is the medical term for diabetes occurring within the context of obesity; another pandemic in the United States.  The latest epidemiological data shows the rising prevalence, health, and economic impact of diabesity.  It’s only getting worse.

            I’ve been a type-2 diabetic for more than 25 years.  I’m acutely aware of what it’s all about.  I have it under good control through hard work and knowledge, but I’m one of the lucky ones.    I’ve had good insurance, a healthy lifestyle, as well as access to great healthcare.  Many today don’t have access, and even more don’t realize they have the chronic disease.  

            Typically, denial came before acceptance, like many others before me.  I write about the personal struggle in a chapter of my motivational memoir, Defy the Immediate.

According to a recent National Institute of Health report, The global prevalence of diabetes in 2010 was 284 million people worldwide constituting around 6.4% of the world population, which is higher than was projected in earlier studies.  Furthermore, the projections for 2030 show the prevalence to reach 439 million individuals comprising 7.7% of the world population.

The economic impact will be more staggering.  The NIH says the burden of diabetes on the world economy has been rising steadily in the last decade to reach $376 billion in 2010 and is expected to reach $490 billion in 2030.  

NIH goes on to say that “Diabesity represents a substantial economic burden as reflected by diabetes and obesity consuming 14% [for diabetes] and 5.7% [for obesity] of the USA's total health expenditure respectively, representing the highest known expenditure on diabesity worldwide. When costs associated with being overweight were also included, the upper limit of obesity expenditure rises to 9.1% of the USA's total healthcare expenditure.”

The Report continues: “The health impact of diabesity is substantial to include long-term diabetic complications, reduction in health-related functioning, reduction of quality of life, and reduced overall life expectancy. Long-term complications include myocardial infarction, cerebrovascular stroke, and end-stage renal disease. Recent advances also have found that there is an association between chronic stress, depression, and sleeping troubles to both diabetes and obesity. This century is the unprecedented diabetogenic era in human history. It is thus urgent to take steps including screening, prevention and early management in an attempt to control this evolving epidemic of diabesity,” according to the NIH Report.

It has long been said that America has suffered from “affluenza,” a term for all the good things that came out of the post-WWII boom.  My generation grew up in the 50’s and 60’s when our lifestyles took a dramatic turn.  As a society we shifted from rural to suburban culture.  Our staples came from grocery stores and not so much from the garden.  With mobility, came convenience. 

We saw the rise of home baking.  Betty Crocker replaced baking from scratch and we developed a craving for sweets.  Here in Michigan, we lean toward Jiffy mixes!  Home baking was now easy and quick.  We saw the rise of fast-food franchises and eating-on-the-go.  Vending machines popped up everywhere.  In my hometown, the cereal industry discovered that sweet sells, and our breakfast habits changed to match our busy lifestyle. 

Eating has almost become an an American sport and the marketing of food has followed.  All of this has created the healthcare problem we have today and it’s still fueled by aggressive marketing in our mass media. 

            One of the benefits of freedom and prosperity is many choices of everything.  As famed economist Milton Friedman said, we are “Free to Chose,” the problem is few of us choose wisely when it comes to what we consume, and we are now paying a terrible price for it.  Especially my generation in which one in three of us will become diabetic, according to the American Diabetes Association.

While government and the media have focused on COVID, as they should, diabesity will be with us long after COVID becomes a bad memory.  Diabesity will only grow in seriousness and will continue to tax our healthcare delivery system.  We need to act now to make combating diabetes and obesity a national priority.  We must make insulin widely available to those who need it and we need to educate ourselves about healthy lifestyle choices.  

The good thing about diabetes, if there is such a thing, is it's the most manageable, and often reversible chronic diseases we can face.  The advances in medications and diagnostic devices for management is astounding.  But, like everything else, it's far better to prevent it in the first place.

I look forward to the day when a White House press conference announces a War on Diabesity as a threat to not only our collective health but our economic stability as a nation.  Today, that’s just a pipe dream, but we can hope.

T. R. Shaw Jr. is CEO of Shaw Communication in Battle Creek, Michigan.  He is a longtime journalist, author, retired U.S. Navy public affairs officer, retired funeral director, and active community leader.  DEFY THE IMMEDIATE; A Journey of Failure, Perseverance and Success, is his first book and is available on Shaw’s website, www.trshawjr.com, and bookstores can order directly from www.missionpointpress.com

2020 A Year of Defiance, Challenges and Opportunities

By T. R. Shaw Jr.           

            As 2020 ends I have an urge to look back, write, and put it all in perspective.  While I’d like to wax poetically about it, it’s a daunting task for any writer or big-thinker. Many will try.

We’ve all been through so much.  COVID-19 of course, shutdowns, quarantines, wildfires, floods, hurricanes, heat waves, racial strife, a contentious election, and social isolation.  Where would you begin?  What a year to remember or forget!

            Instead, I’d like to focus on being a first-time author during a pandemic. 

A year ago in December, I launched my first published book, DEFY THE IMMEDIATE, A Journey of Failure, Perseverance and Success, which I termed a “motivational memoir” on overcoming obstacles and challenges, where I shared my life experiences; both good and bad.

I hosted a great launch party in my hometown, sold many books that evening, and had high hopes for a successful and profitable year, speaking, selling and signing books.  Little did I know how apropos the title would become, as nearly all of us spent the year “Defying the Immediate.” 

The title came from a speech at Central Michigan University by legendary sportscaster and fellow alumnus Dick Enberg, who penned my Foreward.  In his 1980 commencement speech he quoted former CMU President, Dr. Charles Anspach, who frequently lectured the student body when the young Enberg was a student.

Before the internet, oratory was a leadership trait and Anspach was a master speaker.  “Defy the Immediate” was Anspach’s frequent catchphrase.  He encouraged students to persevere and overcome problems and obstacles which blocked your immediate path, Enberg stated.  I never forgot that phrase and it helped me through many tough circumstances in my multiple careers.

After struggling for a few years with the traditional publishing route where you query literary agents hoping one might like it and sell it to a publisher for you. I got little to no response as a first timer.  I sent nearly 20 to 30 query letters, others have done more than 100, each carefully crafted for what each agent wanted.   I actually attended seminars on how to write the letters and researched the agents.  That in itself, was a tedious and time-consuming task. I had only two negative responses.

Even Snoopy had problems with query letters

An author friend, best selling Michigan novelist, John Wemlinger, who had a great deal of success, referred me to his regional editing and publishing firm, Mission Point Press in Northern Michigan, who helps authors get published.  It cost a little, but it was worth it.  It beat banging my head against the wall chasing agents.  It’s best described as “assisted self-publishing.”  The staff of editors and designers really knew the craft and how to get it edited, printed and promoted.  They knew all the common mistakes authors make and guided me through the publishing minefield that exists today.

Late last year, all my long hours of writing, re-writing, editing and re-editing paid off.  We finally got it to press and I became a duly published author!  It was exciting.  It was a beginning, not an end.

Mission Point Press created a sell sheet which was distributed to Michigan bookstores.  It gave my book credibility, a huge help.  A few stores ordered it.  It was very exciting and gratifying.  The initial response was very positive.  But being self-published it requires the author to be the true pitchman.  I followed up with many bookstores and even set up a couple of signing events which I was really looking forward to. 

    Things were looking good and I planned to take several days and visit many bookstores personally selling it, like a traveling salesman.  I found a few bookstores which wanted nothing to do with self-published authors, which surprised me. 

No sooner than I made all these grandiose promotional plans, Michigan shut down with the COVID-19 pandemic.  We couldn’t travel, closed bookstores don’t buy books.  My speaking events all cancelled, and I was left to sell myself from afar.  It had the potential to become very depressing.

I once again sent letters to bookstores “selling” my book, but with few customers during a shutdown, they were reluctant to buy more inventory.  I took to social media and did many targeted Facebook ads which yielded sparse online purchases, but hopefully raised awareness.  I did get on a few radio shows and spoke to several service clubs virtually.  It’s very difficult to sell books with virtual presentations!

Needless to say, it’s been a very challenging year as a first-time author.  I’m hoping to get back into doing live presentations and events in 2021, but not sure when things will open up to allow it.

One of the things I address in my presentations came from my first consultation.  I was  told to think about...“You’re not a celebrity, you haven’t been fired from the White House, and you’ve not landed a plane in the Hudson River…Who are you?  Why should I read your book?”

After some thought, my response to that question became, “I’m a representative of my generation who grew up with high ambition, faced many setbacks and challenges, and now have a platform to educate those coming behind me.  I feel obligated to tell my story and inspire others that success isn’t always certain, and failure is never final.”  In essence, that is what my book is all about.

So this past year, as a first-timer with lofty goals, I’ve had to Defy the Immediate.  I’m not giving up, that’s the essence of my book.  I just hope this next year, my message might catch on with a little more promotion. 

What I have to say, the world needs to hear.  Things can only get better from here, so long as we continue to "Defy the Immediate."

DEFY THE IMMEDIATE is available on Shaw’s website, www.trshawjr.com and bookstores can order directly from www.missionpointpress.com

 

T. R. Shaw Jr. is CEO of Shaw Communication in Battle Creek, Michigan.  He is a longtime journalist, retired U.S. Navy public affairs officer, retired funeral director, and active community leader.  DEFY THE IMMEDIATE is his first book.